Tinder A harmless dating app? by Graeme Lockhart

Is Tinder A harmless dating app? Or a secret government training program to recognise domestic terrorism

The official number of Tinder users stand at 50 million.

The use of Tinder is by profile pictures through your Facebook account being another social network site which matches up friends lists of friend lists in the idea that out of that lot you will match with a female profiles that you like the appearance of but only if at the same time they have been going through the male profiles and also opt a like in your direction, making the two of you a match and then you can talk, have babies and settle down leaving your chaotic hormonal episodes behind you now who wouldn’t put 20 quid aside for that. With 50 million users putting your profile down the pecking order are you likely to be seen?, never mind the unorthodox coincidence that you might like someone at the same time that person is liking you! There is of course a boost my profile button which costs you 3 pounds to use but again if you are boosting your profile at the same time lets say half of the 50 million are men. So 25 million are hitting button at the same time then frankly it’s the image of a neck to neck race at the Grand National, where the leader is in constant fluctuation by opposing challengers I dare say the pressing of the keys on a trumpet will have a smoother transition
So does it increase your chances of meeting the one or decrease your chances well let’s ask Darren brown that who has made a career out of estimations, I couldn’t contact him for a response but I’m sure he would etch his chin up wards with a beleaguered strength of air coming from his nostrils and say Russian roulette any one.
The mastery of simplicity does not escape my attention either when flipping continuously through the profiles like and dislike no matches are made but boost your profile then you get immediate matches appear this is likened to the experiment of Ivan Pavlov idea of positive reinforcement where rats could get a reward by hitting a button after figuring it out, which again brings me to the idea of the rat race increasing the chances of a waste of time by 100%, leaving me to fester that dating sites are just evidence of a non-committed heart in not pursuing our normal mating ritual of talking to a person face to face in a pub.

What tinder could be used for is to equip people with surveillance skills, as you fly through the profile pictures only having a mere glimpse as you like or dislike left or right faster faster and faster. The imaging equipping the brain with a rapid response in recognition of a person of interest. Just imagine 50 million users equipped with these skills in spotting the slightest of irregular anomalies. It could be a twitch of a facial muscle or an opened pour that was not opened on your profile pic that gives you away. Have tinder been at it all this time building an army of people with a mutant like ability and the inevitable removal of empathy.
The process is quite simple you can be part of this by staying on tinder for 24 hours swiping left to right and reporting yourself as a dishevelled mess to authorities only then will you be considered for the top secrete program. Authorised by Donald Trump stipulating congress won’t argue with me now.

In other news has anyone seen Nessie?

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